New Year, New Me

That's what everyone says right? Well they aren't necessarily wrong! "New me" doesn't always mean better though, but let's hope for the best! Gambatte!!


Anyway, I've been making an effort to try and reply to all my messages since I know how it feels to not get a reply, it feels pretty bad unless the conversation ended there. But if you ask a question and don't get a response and know they saw it, kinda feels bad but at same time it shows you that they aren't interested in talking to you. So there is that, as a silver lining, you have stop putting effort towards that friendship and move on.

I'm starting a new role this year too, playing support should be interesting and I hope I do well at it. I've been thinking a lot too and trying to see if retirement is a thing that I'm still heavily interested in or not. While I think there are pros and cons for both playing/retiring, I'm not leaning towards retiring as hard as I did the previous year. A lot has changed, we have new staff+players and moved back to SoCal which I GREATLY prefer over NorCal. All my friends are down here and I need the stress relief/freedom of being social otherwise it's hard for me to function. I'm not great at grinding every day all day, it burns me out much too fast physically and mentally. With the season starting up within 2 weeks, I've been feeling the drive that once carried me to the top of the LCS standings. The fire that made me want to play is coming back, they come and go crashing like tsunami waves on my body. It's exciting but at the same time I have a substitute player in the same role as me, and I want to see him grow as a person and player. I originally wanted him to solely take my spot as soon as possible, but I think at the very least he'll have to put in at least 200% to fill in my shoes. 

I'll write another post later as scrims are starting soon, talk to you guys later.



P.s. is the only way to "subscribe" to my website via e-mail, and it sends notifications when I make a new post? Any idea on how squarespace works for this, thanks.